Webster’s definition of “allow:” to give permission, to permit, to let have, to grant, to admit, to acknowledge
Thesaurus definition: to accredit, to approve, to authorize, to empower, to free-up, to recognize
We all have history, beliefs, habits. We all show up in this world riding in on these experiences, whatever they may be. And yet great blessings are always on the horizon for change, setting the stage for all to be free. And unconditional LOVE…what does this mean in terms of allowing?
“Allowing” equals saying to someone: “as you are.”
This is easier said than done. For me, it requires constant homework and conversations with myself, but it is worth the effort because within allowing, there is also the opportunity to review and shake loose old beliefs and habits, re-examine my history & world history, be vulnerable and trust — to come from a space of knowing that I do not need to alter another to allow them to be as they are, do not need to make them change themselves for me (unless it is done by their choice). When I can accomplish this knowing, I can then choose to stand and be responsible, respectful, and authentic to self and others—and let go.
Acknowledgement of another for the gift of who they are, what they bring to my table, so to speak, provides an opportunity to empower and be empowered. From my experience, I can say this is NOT an easy task. The key for me, however, is to know that I always have a choice to be enrolled or not in another’s ways of being or to allow them or not into my space. After all, there may be times, even in allowing, where discernment is required.
Regarding my parents, allowing them to choose for themselves over the years has always paid off in extraordinary ways. My mom and my Pape’ have each stopped and thought about a choice they were making, once they were reminded that they indeed had a choice and that the responsibility for the results of their choice was with them. They have always understood, even though there have been times that the results may or may not be what they had hoped. However, for me to allow and trust the entire process has always been my stand, as long as my parents stayed safe. Continue reading Oops50: Part II: Being a Proud and Gratified Parent of a Parent: Allowing