Tag Archives: women and aging

Ten Things I Hate/Love About Being 59

JANEI’ll start with ten things I hate, but it might help to pair them up right away with the corresponding things I love!

1) I am turning 60 soon, and even though my dear friend, Nancy, tells me to stop whining about it, I’m having some trouble with that number.  It just sounds older than I think I should be at this point in my life.  I still feel like I’m 35 or, at the most, 40.

2) My knees hurt after I sit for any length of time.

3) I can’t read fine print.

4) My parents, and almost everyone in their generation–in other words, the people who inhabited most of my childhood and youth–are dead.  That’s what happens, I guess when you are the youngest in your family.

5) I’m finding most movies to be pretty disgusting nowadays, even when they are funny.  I worry (occasionally) that I’m turning into a fuddy-duddy, but I suspect it’s just that movies are running short on intelligent humor, high on the adolescent variety. But since I can’t stay awake for a whole movie anyhow, it doesn’t matter!

6) My children are grown.

7) I have lost a lot of the certainty I used to have that, no matter what, everything is going to be okay.

8) I am still working fulltime and see little hope of retiring any time soon.

9) It’s harder to lose weight than it used to be and much easier to gain it in all the unwanted places, where old ladies get fat!

10) Young people call me “Honey” and “Sweetie,” but they are not flirting with me.  (I am starting to be invisible.)

Isn't this a great image I found online?
Isn’t this a great image I found online?


1) I am turning 60 soon, which I regard as a sign that I really am an adult now, and that excites me in a way that only people who were the youngest in their families of origin will understand.  Besides, I hope to have a big party to celebrate, if I can get up the energy to pull it off!

Continue reading Ten Things I Hate/Love About Being 59

Beautiful Women over 50: Vivian Gold


Vivian Gold is a friend of mine that I met through real estate years ago. She happens to be a gifted massage therapist who lives in Asheville (contact info is below in case you feel like you need to do something nice for yourself), and has agreed to answer some questions for Oops50. Enjoy!  Sadhvi

1. What was the first album or 45 record you ever bought?

My first 45 was ABC by The Jackson Five.


My first LP was the Led Zeppelin one with Stairway to Heaven. That song still mesmerizes me today.


2. What is the one thing that you have to have on that makes you feel good when you leave the house?

When I go out, I have to have my lips looking good. In the moment, I really like ZUZU’s lipliner by Gabriele. I usually go for a neutral shade, and the one I’m using now is called “innocence”. Then I use a lipstick and my fave is also one from Gabriele’s. I hate to put chemicals and junk in or on my body, so I buy these at the heath food store, and they are great.


3. What’s your favorite comfort food?

My favorite comfort food in the summer is organic ice cream and in the winter it’s root veggies and lots of good carbs.

4. What do you consider your favorite breakfast?

Well, the thing that I have to have each morning is really good and really strong organic coffee with Almond Breeze Almond/Coconut Milk..  Not just Coconut Milk.. It’s not creamy enough for me.. But the Almond/Coconut is.. The best organic coffee I’ve found for the price and taste is Whole Foods  “360 Pacific Rim”, which is their own brand.


After that, I juice some veggies or make a smoothie with some spirulina powder, bee pollen, ground flax seeds…and add things that I have around that I like.

5. What is your favorite and least favorite thing about being over 50?

My favorite thing about being over 50 is my acceptance of “life on life’s term”. I feel more grounded. All my life’s experiences and lessons I was learning over the years, which might not have connected at the time, have integrated in the last couple of years into a sense of knowing and peace.

My least favorite thing about being over 50 are the little imperfections on my body like my freckles, which used to look great on my sun drenched face and body, but are now big from too much sun in my life. Oh, and another thing that I am not really thrilled about is keeping up with waxing my unwanted hair.

Vivian Gold LMT.
Global Vision Healing Arts
Massage and Wellness Therapy
Asheville, North Carolina
(828) 691-6916

My Husk


Sometimes I feel like my husk, my body, is getting ready to shed, leaving only “me”—my core, my soul, my essence—behind.  And where will I be then?  Or maybe the question should be, what happens to the core “me”?

Some would say heaven or hell.  Others would say the essence returns to the universe in some other form.  Others say that “I” will be born again, perhaps as some lower being, perhaps as a more enlightened being.  Some might believe that, after death on this planet, the soul returns to somewhere in space where it originated.

All those ideas are attractive to me in some ways, but not completely satisfactory.  I have a very hard time “believing” in anything that takes place after I’m gone from this earth.  Even though I take on faith that electricity makes the light bulb glow, and I can’t see electricity.  But then, almost everyone agrees (has been taught) about electricity.  But not everyone agrees about what happens after the body, the husk, has been shucked.


My body, the body I’ve never been all that fond of, has proved to be much more resilient than I every imagined it could be.  It has survived, although with considerable wear and tear, numerous and considerable assaults—from chemotherapy and radiation and immune disease and countless episodic drugs for infections and “conditions” like gastrointestinal upsets of various kinds.

I should be more appreciative of this body, this husk that protects the real me, as best it can.  There’s only so much an old husk (I am 70, after all) can do to beat off the many threats to its integrity.  There comes a time when rejuvenation, or return to the original state, is no longer possible.  That’s where my body is now. And I find myself (the real me) frustrated with this.

I miss the good old days when I could come down with something and then get over it.  There’s no getting over it anymore.  As one of my friends says, now it’s just all patch, patch, patch.  Making do with the “new normal”, which changes frequently as my body deals, successfully or not so much, with new challenges—new drugs, new problems in the body, new attitudes in the “real me.”

Lately, I’ve noticed that the general culture has picked up on the insight that positivity is a good thing.  And that “being present” can relieve stress.  So we have lots of platitudes posted on websites and sent in emails and embroidered on pillows and printed on greeting cards, and in fact, just about everywhere.

Be here nowSmile, God loves you.  Love is the answer.  But I’m still stuck on shit happens! And that’s how I view the wearing down of my body, my husk.  It’s just one of those things.  Shit happens.  And as to what will happen to me, my core, my essence when my body, my husk fails totally, well, it’s always good to have a little mystery in your life.




Beautiful Women over 50: Peggy Sands!


Peggy Sands is not only a beautiful woman over 50, but she’s an artist that I like a lot.  And since I don’t like everything that I see these days that is called “art”, and I didn’t know that she did such beautiful paintings, I wanted to share her with you.

She paints murals.  She paints with colors that make me squeal. Go to her website and buy some of her paintings.  Or have her make a mural for your bedroom or living room.  The world needs more art and more artists like her.


Just for fun, I asked her to answer 5 questions recently, and here is what she said:

1. What was the name of the first record you ever bought?

Rubber Soul: THE BEATLES


2. What is the one thing you have to put on or have on that makes you feel good about leaving the house?  And, what is your favorite perfume?

It’s a bracelet I got for Christmas that makes me feel really special when I remember to wear it.  And Nina Ricci L’Air De Temps is my favorite perfume.


3. What is your favorite comfort food?

Almonds and raisins maybe?  No, wait, I can’t do comfort food – I’m on the diet from hell to try to revive my adrenals and thyroid.

Oh, I know, oatmeal raisin cookies or Miso soup (Can you believe it? Miso? Comfort? So embarrassing!).

4. Have you found the perfect bra?

Yes! One from Victoria’s Secret, I got it years ago and I still like it a lot.

5. What’s your favorite and least favorite thing about being over 50?

I never ever think about it.  But, if I have to think about it, the least favorite I suppose is wrinkles and the body falling apart slowly but surely.  And the best is loving and accepting myself, and not beating myself up anymore, and becoming whole.


Women over 50: I Trust I am Exactly where I am meant to Be!


As a women over 50, I’ve begun to feel a change in how I perceive the “younger generation”, in how I react to seeing people in love kissing, in how I am not able to multi-task so easily (and I just started to do that – darn!), and how being overwhelmed is apparently the norm these days.  I subscribe to Gwyneth Paltrow’s GOOP.  She has some interesting recipes, she’s turned me onto some great food blogs, she writes as if communicating with a friend, and well, she is most definitely on-the-go as you will see by reading a journal of one of her days at the end of this post. I was exhausted jut reading what she does! After reading it, I realized a couple of things: 1) that I will never be in the same league as Gwyneth in this lifetime, and 2) it’s really Ok to be mellow, to be relaxed, because that is what I like.  After all, I am just a 70’s girl who happens to love connecting in the year 2011! So here is something that will make you feel good by reading it aloud to yourself, right before you shift to what Gwyneth goes through in a day, bless her heart!

“There is peace within me.  I trust that I am exactly where I am meant to be.

I remember the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in myself and

others.  I use the gifts that I have received and pass on the love that has

been given to me.  I am content with myself just the way I am.  This knowledge

settles into my bones, and allows my soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise

and love.  It is there for each and every one of us.”
Continue reading Women over 50: I Trust I am Exactly where I am meant to Be!