I Wanted to Write about my Dad on Father’s Day and Now it’s Too Late.

Annice

I wanted to write about my dad on Father’s Day and now it’s too late.  You’re probably thinking who cares about Father’s Day now?  But I do.  You see, my dad, Sanford Brown, died April 28th, barely two months ago, and I’m still grieving.

Me and my Dad only 2 years ago

It feels like I always will grieve, and maybe that’s why I haven’t been able write about him.  If it were any other topic, I’d just call it procrastination, but here, now, it’s more poignant.

I want to write about how close I was to my dad–tell you how I miss our telephone conversations about politics, books, current events, my work, and family, especially his grandchildren and great grandchildren.  At times, I find myself reaching for the phone to call, and then I realize that I will never hear his voice again.  Yes, it’s very sad.

My dad was 85, and one week before he died, I traveled to Cleveland to celebrate his 85th birthday and Passover with our family.  He was especially proud to witness his nine-year-old great grandson, Jacob, conduct the entire Seder not only in English but Hebrew, too.  It was truly a spectacular day.

His great-grandson Jacob wanted to see the company my dad founded

Days after I got home, my sister called to say Dad was in the hospital, and it didn’t look good.  Back I went, hoping it would all work out.  Like many of you with aging parents, I always knew that dreaded call would come one day, but somehow, I still wasn’t prepared.  Despite the fact that my dad was 85 and had lived a good long life, it still seems too short.  And, despite the fact that he was not really sick and lived in the same house for the last 56 years surrounded by family and friends, it’s still too short.

Dad and grandsons Alexander & Mason in DC

If anyone were to ask me what I learned from my dad, I would tell them: how to love unconditionally, the importance of family, loyalty, forgiveness, charity, to travel and see the world; maintain a strong work ethic, and make sure there is laughter in your life.

While I haven’t perfected all of these qualities, I am forever grateful to have my dad’s teachings to guide me through my life’s journey.

Dad's 83rd birthday with a rare glass of cognac

6 thoughts on “I Wanted to Write about my Dad on Father’s Day and Now it’s Too Late.

  1. I remember meeting your father years ago. You are so fortunate to have had such a wonderful, loving father who gave you so much (way beyond material measure!). And, he was lucky to have you as a daughter. The pics are really nice, but I love the photo of the the two of you, taken just two years ago. You’ll always miss him, but you can never lose him.

  2. Annice, thanks so much for telling us about your wonderful father. I was thinking about you Sunday and wondering how you were doing. I know it’s hard. Take care.

  3. Thanks for sharing; I know you must feel like a big hole exists inside. Even though I was not fortunate enough to meet your dad, a large part of him certainly lives on in the qualities he passed along to you. And I am fortunate to know you!
    I just read the following quote to my dad on father’s day: “A man’s worth is measured by how he parents his children. What he gives them, what he keeps away from them, the lessons he teaches and the lessons he allows them to learn on their own.” Lisa Rogers
    We are some of the fortunate!

  4. Dad’s certainly occupy a most important chunk in our lives; their deaths leave such a big hole in our hearts and even in how we think about things. When my Dad died I thought my world had shrunk dramatically–it felt like I had lost part of my back bone. It’ sa long grief but you do get to the other side of it.

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