The next time you or one of your dear friends celebrate her 88thbirthday, I highly recommend afternoon tea at the Biltmore Inn located on the Biltmore Estate in the beautiful mountains of Asheville, North Carolina.
The Biltmore Inn
You all have been introduced to my dear friend Adele Rose, and on Nov. 24th she turned 88. I say that’s a cause for celebration in grandiose style. Joined by our favorite yoga teacher and friend, Cindy Dollar from One Center Yoga, the three of us arrived promptly for tea at 4:00 p.m.
How far you would drive for a great AFFORDABLE haircut? Would you drive 2.5 hours? I confess, I did exactly that. Included in that haircut was color to banish the gray, a few caramel-colored highlights that my sister says is needed to lighten up the face, and since I had to wait for the color anyway, I went ahead and had my eyebrows waxed. So there, I drove 2.5 hours up and over the mountains (round-trip) from Asheville, NC to Unicoi, TN for a day of high maintenance. On the way, I picked up my friend Betty in Marshall where we had breakfast at Zuma’s before heading out to the Dragonfly Salon.
Me, Betty and Zuma's
“Why do it?, my husband asks. “You’re crazy. You mean to tell me there is not one hairdresser in all of Asheville who can cut your hair?” Of course there is, but I don’t feel like paying two hundred dollars every time I need a cut and color. You see, I was spoiled by Mari, who is not only a great haircutter and colorist, but does it very affordably.
The Infamous Dragonfly Salon in Unicoi, TN
Me and Mari - the process begins
When Mari first moved to Tennessee I told myself I would never drive to another state for a haircut. That was before I spent two years in search of the perfect hairdresser, stopping women everywhere asking them who cut their hair and how much they paid. I had no shame. I want to tell you, no one has ever accused me of being cheap. I completely support stylists getting as much as they can for their haircuts. It’s just that I can’t pay those big city prices, and let’s not forget that the economy tanked and without any cost of living increase over the last three years, my salary has been going down instead of up. And yes, I’m happy to have a job – no whining here.
So, after considerable introspection, I embarked on the Big C (the big compromise). I opted to go local and accept a mediocre haircut and color at half the price. That lasted for two years until my mediocre stylist turned what was supposed to be brown hair (with caramel highlights) totally blond. I screamed. I had no one to blame but myself. Why did I tell her to leave her lazy husband who hadn’t worked for two years and forced her to pay the mortgage, the loan for his houseboat, and his kid’s vacation at Disneyland? No doubt, my blond hair was punishment for giving out free advice when not asked!
So that’s how I ended up driving 2.5 hours to Tennessee with my good friend Betty, only to return to North Carolina at 4:00 in the afternoon, nicely coiffed and colored. And in case you’re wondering why I just don’t go gray, let me tell you, if the economy gets any worse, I will have to because I won’t be able to afford the gas.
If you’re thinking about a trip to the beautiful mountains of Asheville, NC, think about the week of September 20-26th. It’s Active Aging Week, and the theme is: Be Active Your Way. The Center for Creative Retirement at The University of North Carolina (www2.unca.edu/nccr/) will participate by hosting Active Aging Day, a free series of activities, lectures, and displays on Saturday, September 25th, at The Reuter Center on the UNCA campus from 9 am until 4 pm. Mid-day keynote speaker will be James Laditka, MD from UNC Charlotte. Dr. Laditka will talk about The Brain Initiative. Activities will be held throughout the day and include things such as Zumba, Fun With Words & Games, Tai Chi, Line Dancing, Nia, and Laughter Yoga. Lectures will be held on topics such as “The Benefits of Exercise,” “Gardening for Your Health,” “Food for Your Brain,” and “Hiking the Blue Ridge.” Talk about aging gracefully!
Unfortunately, I can’t go because I’ll be visiting my sister in New Mexico, but if I was here, I’d sure be soaking in all the free activities – “Laughter Yoga” is my favorite pick.
If you go and want to write about your experience, send it to us, and we’ll post it.
Given all the fuss a post or two ago about Oprah looking for women obsessed with aging and beauty, I am happy to turn that page and introduce you to a beautiful and creative woman over 50 who is far too busy creating cards and more for us women over 50 than being obsessed with aging. Meet Diane English, a self-taught artist who owned a metaphysical book store in St. Augustine, Florida before moving to Asheville, NC 10 years ago. After reading The Artist’s Way by Julie Cameron, Diane decided to follow her dream of combining art with her spiritual path allowing her to embark on the next phase of her life. After visiting her in her studio and seeing many of her cool, cosmic characters, I’d say she is living her dream – minus the downtown condo she covets.
Diane at play, oops, I mean work.
Diane is the owner and creator of The Great Cosmic Happy Ass Card Co,and if you’ve never received one of her cards, send yourself one. Why not? They’re inspiring, whimsical and just plain old kick-ass funny. This is one of my favorites. This beautiful woman over 50 has aspired to achieve a higher consciousness along her journey, and not without some help from “years of deep meditation, medication, fasting, prayer and a few bottles of Merlot.” Having had a subscription to her cards, I knew I was in for a treat when we finally sat down in her lovely bright living room drinking coffee and nibbling scones.
Oops50: What made you finally decide to leave Florida and your bookstore, “Dream Street,” and go into the card business?
Diane: About once every 7 years, I did a painting, and one of them was titled, “Reach for Your Stars.” That became my first card, and it sold out in my bookstore. Then, I made more cards and magnets, and soon those sales were accounting for 20% of my gross revenue. That’s when the big box book stores moved in, and I took that as sign to make a change.
Oops50: Kind of like the movie, “You’ve Got Mail.”
Diane: I really wanted to use smart ass but I didn’t feel I could really do that. So, my customers helped me pick the name.
Oops50: So now I’m going to change the subject a little. What’s your fondest childhood memory?
Diane: My grandfather carrying me on his shoulders while walking me to the zoo. He was Irish and English, and we lived in Philly and walked everywhere. When we got to the zoo, there was a blackbird in a cage at the entrance and he said, “Hi, I’m Joe.”
Oops50: What’s was the first record you bought? Diane: It’s a tie between Rachmaninoff’s Piano Concerto and Bill Haley and the Comets.
Oops50: Any advice for women over 50?
Diane: Well, I’m well over 50 – 68 in fact. Don’t listen to anyone. Follow your heart and do what you want to do. Don’t be intimidated by the “should’s” in life. Oh yeah, and keep your nose out of other people’s business.
Oops50: Right. I need to remember that. So what turns you on?
Diane: A romantic dinner in an Italian restaurant, with Luciano Pavarotti singing in the background.
Oops50: So you like Italian?
Diane: I had an aunt who married an Italian, and I remember wonderful Italian dinners. And I like to cook Italian food–outrageously delicious.
Oops50: What next? Any new dreams?
Diane: A downtown condo with a large patio and a great view of the mountains of Western NC. It should have a cable railing, a fireplace on the left side, a kitchen behind that, and a loft upstairs. The light will be clean and beautiful. And, don’t forget Rachmaninoff playing in the background.
Oops50: Any must have products you can’t live without?
Diane: My Netflix subscription and Roku, so I can download old movies.
Oops50: So what’s your favorite movie?
Diane: “Casablanca.” And have you seen “Sunshine Cleaning?” A very funny movie.
Oops50: So what’s Roku?
Diane: It’s great. A little black box that lets you stream movies from Netflix. It’s great.
Oops50: I’ll check it out. Last question: Any regrets so far?
Diane: Only that I didn’t know in my 20s what I know now. And, that I don’t have the same body as I did in my 20’s.
Rize Cole on her birthday getting a ride w/Harley Davidson instructor Susan Harrison.
Staying in my Lane
I often hear the words “Be you for you.”
I chose to internalize this by taking full responsibility.
I WILL BE ME FOR ME.
We are constantly focusing on the exterior, “what will they think and what will they say?”. What matters to me is what I think and what I say. What I am thinking is a powerful clue as to what is in my consciousness . When we are looking at the exterior, are we neglecting the interior and what is resonating within?
As an elder, I have come to the realization that this is my journey and I can take the fast or scenic route, whichever suits me.
Being an elder can be awesome if you are mentally, physically and spiritually healthy. For some of us, it is the first time we can stand in our truth, think of self first and be impeccable. I am aware many elders are still stuck in the past, living with regrets and should have’s, but for most of us it is a joyful time to do our own thing. I have no concerns about the opinions of others. What am I supposed to do with what someone thinks of me? I can observe…they are thinking, but they are in my lane and need to get back in their lane and MTOB (mind their own business).
I may also choose to have fun with them. One of my favorite ways to walk in the world is by tooting my horn when someone makes a decision to get into my lane. This may look like a tilt of my head and a gentle smile, or I may change lanes by changing the subject. If they are bold or rude enough to follow me into my new lane, I might let them have it with both barrels, which may sound like a giant laugh and a hug or I may just say something like, “ Oh… listen to that beautiful bird singing” or “Oh… I do love your hat” and continue talking about my love of hats, birds or whatever until they get back into their lane or forget what they had asked me in the first place.
Results: My blood pressure is ok and their feelings are intact.
77 year old poet Rize Cole currently lives in West Columbia, South Carolina.
Rize enjoys traveling, reading, cooking and whatever makes her happy!
